Sunday Soaking: Praying For Our Children to Be Thankful

“…give thanks in all circumstances;
for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
I Thessalonians 5:18 [NIV]

When our oldest was only one year old, after prompting by our pastor, I began to pray for a thankful heart in my child. I continued this prayer as we added each additional child. Four kids – and three grandchildren – later, I’m still praying for thankful Macfarlan hearts.

“Why thankfulness?” you may ask.

The first (or most obvious) response might be the blessing released to others. That is true. And that is important. Others are blessed when we express gratitude.

But I’m also convinced that thankfulness is a blessing to the one releasing it. Thankfulness protects against entitlement, materialism, and selfishness … all dangerous to the character of children. The 21^st-century culture of our western world makes them vulnerable to “me-ism” – I’m convinced entitlement, materialism, and selfishness are the default, but our prayers can combat these society norms. We are up against entrenched attitudes, human nature, and even commercials and advertisements. The world will corrupt and entice all of us to make it all about us.

It’s natural (and easy) to make it all about self in this world. But never underestimate the power of a praying mom – or grandmother, or aunt, Sunday School teacher, youth leader, coach, godparent, or anyone else who has influence in a young life! We can best fight the culture on our knees. And we can train up the young people we love to live selfless in a “selfie” world.

As we consider praying for thankful children, consider these prayer prompts:

• Lord, give my child a thankful heart. (I Thessalonians 5:18)
• Jesus, let my child see that every good gift comes down from above. (James 1:17)
• God, I pray my child would intentionally release thankfulness to others.
• Holy Spirit, I pray our family would be thankful in “all circumstances” – by faith, believing that You can and will work all things out for our good and for Your glory. (Romans 8:28)

As we pray, we can also put feet to our prayers by taking these practical steps to teach thankfulness to our children, grandchildren, and the other young people in our lives:

1. Do not overindulge in “stuff” but show love in creative ways. Whenever possible, give experiences and time, instead of things.
2. Choose at least one night per week to pray “Thank you” prayers. Rather than asking God for something, take turns thanking Him for what He has already done for the blessings of the day. Teach them to pray thank-you prayers for big and small things:
   “God, thank you for the tulips popping through in the flower bed and reminding us that spring is coming.”
   “Jesus, thank you for the baby growing in Aunt Denise’s tummy.”
   “Holy Spirit, thank you for our fun afternoon in the park.”
3. Train a child to respond with thankfulness:
   1. Write thank you notes together with preschoolers—allowing them to add their names to the note with your help.
   2. For elementary-aged kids, encourage them to be conscientious about writing thank you notes to their teacher, coach, and/or sponsor for their soccer team.
   3. Train teenagers to write thank you notes before cashing the check from grandma and grandpa.
4. Model thankfulness. Most character traits are more “caught than taught,” as I’ve heard Dr. James Dobson say on many occasions.
   1. Sit down together to write thank you notes after Christmas.
   2. Let them hear you intentionally thank your pastor for his teaching on Sunday morning.
   3. Thank them for big and small things when you see and hear them get it right:
      “Thank you for helping your brother.”
      “Thank you for carrying in the groceries for your grandmother.”
      “Thank you for making your bed without being asked.”
5. When dining out, ask to speak to the manager and enjoy seeing his/her face transform from dread to delight when you say, “Our family had such a great meal this evening. Thank you for the good food and excellent service.” (On the way home, explain that people always complain when someone gets it wrong, but it’s important to express our thanks when they get it right!)

The importance of thankfulness was a thread woven through the teaching of Dr. Jonathan Burnham, my wise and godly pastor in the early nineties. Over and again, his preaching emphasized the theme of thankfulness. Even after moving out of state, that emphasis continued to resonate in my heart and be a priority in my prayers.

All these years later, I give glory to God as I see thankfulness demonstrated in the lives of my children. The thank you notes I have received from them are treasures to keep. They are tangible reminders that, while I did many things wrong, perhaps consistent training in gratitude was one thing I did right.

Whether you are praying thankfulness into your children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews, students, or the kids who live across the street or sit in the pew behind you – I hope you will pray. And I hope that we can all see our society truly transformed by an “attitude of gratitude.”

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This week, Laura kicked off our fall Bible study of II Corinthians by exploring the history, geography, and people of Corinth. Then, she guided us in a look at the apostle Paul, who planted the church in Corinth.

This fall, Laura’s teaching videos will be published each Friday for those who wish to study virtually, but if you live in Northwest Arkansas or Northeast Oklahoma, we would love for you to study with us in person on Wednesday mornings in Siloam Springs!

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