“…give thanks in all circumstances;
for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
I Thessalonians 5:18 [NIV]
Prompted by my pastor when our oldest was only one year old, I began to pray for a thankful heart in my child. I continued this prayer as we added each additional child. Four kids – and two grandkids later – and I’m still praying for thankful Macfarlan hearts.
“Why thankfulness?” you ask.
The first (or obvious) response might be the blessing released to others. That is true. And that is important. Others are blessed when we express gratitude.
But I’m also convinced that thankfulness is a blessing to the one releasing it. Thankfulness protects against entitlement, materialism, and selfishness … all dangerous to the character of our children. The 21st-century culture of our western world makes our children vulnerable to “me-ism” – I’m convinced entitlement, materialism, and selfishness are the default, but our prayers can combat these society norms. We are up against entrenched attitudes, human nature, and even commercials and advertisements. The world will corrupt and entice all of us to make it all about us. It’s natural and easy to make it all about self in this “selfie” world.
But never underestimate the power of a praying mom! We can best fight the culture on our knees. And we can train up children to live selfless in a selfie world.
As we consider praying our children are thankful, consider these prayer prompts:
- Lord, give my child a thankful heart. (I Thessalonians 5:18)
- Jesus, let my child see that every good gift comes down from above. (James 1:17)
- God, I pray my child would intentionally release thankfulness to others.
- Holy Spirit, I pray our family would be thankful in “all circumstances” – by faith, believing that You can and will work all things out for our good and for Your glory. (Romans 8:28)
As we pray, we can also put feet to our prayers by taking these practical steps to teach thankfulness to our children:
- Do not overindulge in “stuff” but show love in creative ways.
- Choose at least one night per week to pray “Thank you” prayers. Rather than asking God for something, take turns thanking Him for what He has already done for the blessings of the day. Teach them to pray thank-you prayers for big and small things:
“God, thank you for the tulips popping through in the flower bed and reminding us that spring is coming.”
“Jesus, thank you for the baby growing in Aunt Denise’s tummy.”
“Holy Spirit, thank you for our fun afternoon in the park.” - Train your child to respond with thankfulness:
- Write thank you notes together with your preschooler—allowing him or her to add their name to the note with your help.
- Assist your elementary-aged child to write thank you notes to their teacher, coach, and/or sponsor for their soccer team.
- Train your teenager to write thank you notes before cashing the check from grandma and grandpa.
- Model thankfulness. Most character traits are more “caught than taught,” as I’ve heard Dr. James Dobson say on many occasions.
- Sit down together to write thank you notes after Christmas.
- Let them hear you intentionally thank your pastor for his teaching on Sunday morning.
- Thank your children for big and small things when you see and hear them get it right:
“Thank you for helping your brother.”
“Thank you for being kind to your sister.”
“Thank you for making your bed without being asked.”
- Ask to speak to the manager when dining out and enjoy seeing his/her face transform from dread to delight when you say, “Our family had such a great meal this evening. Thank you for the good food and excellent service.” (On the way home explain to your children that people always complain when someone gets it wrong, but it’s important to release thankfulness when they get it right!)
The importance of thankfulness was a thread woven through the teaching of Dr. Jonathan Burnham, my wise and godly pastor in the early nineties. Over and again he emphasized the theme of thankfulness in his preaching. Even after moving out of state, that emphasis continued to resonate in my heart and be a priority in my prayers.
All these years later, I give glory to God as I see thankfulness demonstrated in the lives of my children. The thank you notes I have received from them are treasures to keep. They are tangible reminders that, while I did many things wrong, perhaps consistent training in gratefulness was one thing I did right.
Whether you are praying thankfulness into your own children or grandchildren, into your nieces and nephews, or the kids who live across the street or sit in the pew behind you – I hope you will pray. And I hope that we can all see that a society can truly be transformed by an “attitude of gratitude.”
Have you downloaded our September ‘Write the WORD’ bookmark, 30 Prayers & Verses for Our Children? Download your free copy here and start praying! And if you are on Facebook, please visit (and like!) the Cross My Heart Ministry page, where we are posting a graphic with each daily prayer prompt and verse during the entire month of September.
Last week was a scheduled break in the I Kings Bible study. We hope you’ll take a moment to watch as Laura shares this short prequel to Lesson 3:
If you’ve not had time to watch all of the teaching videos in the I Kings study, you can find the entire YouTube playlist here.
