Sunday Soaking: The Tongue — A Tool for Building Up or Tearing Down

In the course of one day – even one hour – our words can encourage and inspire … or they can discourage and destroy.  

You and I can easily recall a scene from our childhood, teenage years, or even last week, when the words of a friend, family member, or acquaintance brought a blessing that spurred us on – or robbed us of our joy, bringing tears to our eyes and pain to our hearts. Even after many years, those memories have the power to bring up thoughts and feelings as if they just happened.  

Words carry heavy weight and great power. They can be used for good or evil. Perhaps the greatest indicator of our stewardship is how we use our words to influence others.  

We teach and train our children to say the right things on the outside: 

• Yes, Ma’am.
  
• No, Sir.
  
• Thank you.
  
• You’re welcome.
  

But we must be diligent to train their hearts.  Jesus reminded us: 

“…out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.”
Matthew 12:34 

Our tongues are the bucket drawing up what is hidden in the well of our hearts. Training and taming our tongues must begin with what we pour into our hearts. 

As we’ve been reading and writing in Proverbs, many of the passages have focused on the tongue and the power of words: 

• The lips of the righteous nourish many, but fools die for lack of judgment. Proverbs 10:21 
• An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up. Proverbs 12:25 
• He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin. Proverbs 13:3
• A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly. Proverbs 14:29 
• A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1 
• A man finds joy in giving an apt reply – and how good is a timely word. Proverbs 15:23 
• Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Proverbs 16:24 
• A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions. Proverbs 18:2 
• He who answers before listening—that is his folly and his shame. Proverbs 18:13 
• The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Proverbs 18:21 

Please take a moment to read those verses again slowly. When you have finished, pray them back to God for yourself, your children, and your spouse.   

Controlling and stewarding our words is another area for not only teaching our children, but actively living out a godly role model before them. Of course, we won’t always get it right. Of course, we will lose our tempers, become impatient, or speak rashly and without thought. But as we grow in Christ, yielding more and more to the Holy Spirit, we can hopefully see a downturn in those behaviors.  

As the Spirit increasingly controls our hearts, our tongue will bring forth more of the Holy Spirit’s influence from that well: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. 

When you get it wrong, own it. Repent, apologize, receive forgiveness from God and from others, then move on. Don’t languish in self-condemnation.   

Our good choices provide a godly example for our children – and even our poor choices (and there will be plenty of those!) model what to do when we get it wrong. As we repent and seek forgiveness, they have a recipe for a “do-over” … and aren’t we ALL grateful that the Kingdom of God has room for do-overs?  

Let’s intentionally, consciously, deliberately use our tongues to inspire, build up, and encourage others today! In this week’s Friday video, Laura shared a prequel to our fall Bible study in I Corinthians, by looking briefly at Acts 18 where we find a little insight into how the church at Corinth was established. Please listen in and share this video with others, as a means of inviting them to join the Bible study in person, online, or by independently following along!

As we approach September and the start of this year’s Bible study, we invite women in the Northwest Arkansas / Northeast Oklahoma area to join us in person on Wednesday mornings, beginning September 7th. We meet from 9 – 11 a.m. (weather permitting) at Camp Siloam in Siloam Springs, AR. For those who live outside the area or can’t attend for other reasons, we are making it possible for you to join an online group or study along on your own.

Want to learn more about how you can participate? Visit our Facebook event page for all the relevant details!